An acquaintance of mine shared an experience of how many of
his sons came to him of their own free will to ask for help to overcome their
struggles pornography. Those boys really must have trusted their father. What
do I have to do to inspire that kind of trust in my children? I discussed this
question with my wife and she described to me how she was surrounded with many
immoral choices growing up, but whenever she was faced with enticing situations
she never participated in the unwholesome activities that the crowd was doing. She says she always remembered the gentleness
and unconditional love of her father, and she simply didn’t want to let him
down. Essentially, my father in law
motivated his daughter with love and not with threatening punishments. My
position is that if we want to inspire trust in others we should do it by love and
not by fear. That’s the kind of father that I want to be – a father who
inspires trust by teaching his children to love him.
Scaring someone to do something will not make them to want to continue on that path. If we can inspire someone to choose that decision for themselves it will cause them to continue choosing that thing. I agree with you and I think this will be an important principle in raising children.
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